Ringing in the new year...

Like there is not other.

At home with the Bug. ☺ I wouldn't want it any other way. (Well okay, maybe 2% of me can think of other things I would want to be doing, but not enough to do a damn thing about it.)


So here's where every one makes a resolution for a new year. I've come to the conclusion in my wise old age...all 28 years, that if you have to make a resolution only once a year - either you have life figured out or you are just too damn lazy to make goals for yourself more than once a year. I'll let you decide which one applies to you.

I do not make resolutions. I just take life in stride and make modifications where it applies.

Through the year I have encountered ups and downs and life can go no where but up from here. You know that saying, when life hands you lemons cut them up and take shots...wait a minute, something's not right there. That's the weekend motto. ☺ When life hands you lemons make lemonade. Sounds a bit better and quenches your thirst at the same time.

To the family and friends who have helped me turn over a new chapter in my life thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul for being the best support anyone could have ever asked for. Learning how to be a single mom has provided nothing but entertainment, a few more gray hairs, learning how to be carefree, and how to raise a boy.

I think some of my favorite boy moments have been where Corbin tells me as I walk into the bathroom saying, "Mommy, don't forget to wipe your weiner!" I'm sorry...WHAT? Or when he plays with his toy from Aunty Dawn. The toy tells him "You'll do better next time" and he gets SOOOO excited and yells "MOMMY! I will do better next time! Good job for me!"

Can I keep the Bug at three? He's perfect at cuddling but being independent. Guess I have to just let him be and take the next step in raising a boy. Now where did I leave that manual?

Here's to a new year and being bold.

♫ And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, I'ma face my demons

I'm manning up, I'ma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now! ♫

So with the new year crawling it's way to the West Coast the Bug and I wish you happiness and let the new year bring you happiness in every aspect of your life.

Bittersweet endings...

♫ There's not a mean bone in my body

I never could be unkind

I know we're not talking

But there's something on my mind

It ain't righteous indignation

I don't plan to rant or rave

No need for us to fight and fuss

I just want to say

Have a nice rest of your life without me

I'll be proud to be a part of your history

If it makes you happy honey

Keep talking bad about me

And have a nice rest of your life without me - Randy Travis ♫

Well it's done. Signed, sealed, and delivered. I am officially divorced. About damn time. Only took 1 year and 7 months....dear Lord.

I honestly don't know if I would have been able to do this without my family and friends. I have never had a more awesome support system. This whole process has been full of  bittersweet moment because I have lost good friends and learned who my true ones are. Those who have stuck by my side through the thick and thin and the complete ups and downs.

A lot of this hasn't sunk in just yet. I'm still processing everything. I have my moments of 'YES. I win, this is over' to 'This is not how I wanted this to end'. I guess in this case that's natural and that's just how it goes. It is what it is (I swear I was just bitching about this phrase), these are the cards I have been dealt and from here I move forward. I love you my support system for all the times you've let me bitch, to being my shoulder to cry on, and to making me laugh at life and letting me know that everything will be okay.

So here's to opening a new chapter in my life as I sign off on the old one. A toast....to me and officially starting a new beginning.

♫ Somebody's gonna give you a lesson in leaving

Somebody’s gonna give you back what you been givin’

And I hope that I’m around

To watch’em knock you down

It’s like you to love ‘em and leave ‘em

Just like you loved me and left me

It’s like you to do that sort of thing

Over and over again

You’re a fool hearted man

I hear you’ve been asking about me

From some of my friends

But you better believe I’m not going

Through that again

You’re the kind of man

A women thinks she can change

Oh but the only thing changing

Is my way of thinking

And I’m thinking that maybe someday ♫

Chin up, Kid

♫ You got to keep on keepin on
You got to keep your head up high
You gotta work with what you've got
And someday you will flyyyyy ♫

There are days I want to throw in the towel - today being one of them. From love - to faith - to hope. I just don't get the way life works some times and why things are the way they are. I can't stand the sayings, 'it is what it is', 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger', 'if it's meant to be it's meant to be'...what the hell happened to being able to be in control of life and guiding it the way you wanted it to go?

My daddy doesn't talk too often, he usually says hi and passes the phone on to my mom, but the times I need him the most he is there for me. Growing up, crying wasn't really an option. He always told me, 'chin up, kid. Crying isn't going to get you anwhere.' Yup - the wise words rang again this time around. Somehow they made me feel better.

I have a hard time with letting things be. I am not a fan of the unexpected. I do not believe there is a higher power out there with a plan for me, but I do believe that Karma comes around. Now the being patient part will be the part that kills me...

I would like to think I am a patient person with a big heart. Lately I feel that patience running thing and my heart becoming more skeptical and less tolerant of bullshit.

My new goal in life...

Deep breath...it will all be okay, right?

Through this road I have traveled...

I have learned who my true friends/family are.

♫ Thank you for being a friend
Traveled down the road and back again
Your heart is true your a pal and a confidant.

And if you through a party
Invited everyone you ever knew
You would see the biggest gift would be from me
And the card attached would say thank you for being a friend. ♫

The lights at the end of my tunnels are becoming one and getting closer. In the next month I will have finalized my divorce, won custody of my son, and taken a huge step forward in putting my life back together. I've noticed the last couple of weeks I've started seeing glimpses of the old me. I can't even begin to express how excited and happy I am to have the old me coming back through. The smallest victories end up being the biggest.

I am sooooo excited for Thanksgiving and the holidays! We have had such wonderful winter weather that is to include lots of rain and indoor activities! With a three year old it gets hard containing all that excitement and energy. So what do we do?

Yay for being messy and making little hand prints. I was looking at his art and all I could do was think how much he's grown and he's not little anymore. :( His little hands are getting bigger! It's so cute to see how he changes as the years grow. Now if only I can get that kid to gain some weight on his little body that would be great!!

My little boy is growing up - as long as he's happy and healthy I guess I'll let him get a little bigger. Not much, just a little...

Today was another wonderful family day. It was Uncle Scottie's birthday party! He's finally 21! WOOHOO. I really need to start getting more pictures of him. Unfortunately I didn't have Bug. (Not to worry that will change very soon!! WOOT!) But of course I got a picture of my adorable baby niece Avery.

This little one is going to be very spoiled with me as Aunty. I already can't make it through Target without shopping and getting something for her every time I get Bug something. Oh well - she's the only little girl I have to shop for at the moments so until I have my own she's just gonna have to suffer and get clothes from me. I'm sure no one will complain! ♥

♫ We are family
I got all my sisters with me
We are family
Get up ev'rybody and sing

Ev'ryone can see we're together
As we walk on by and we fly just like birds of a feather
I won't tell no lie all of the people around us they say
Can they be that close
Just let me state for the record
We're giving love in a family dose ♫

I am woman -

Hear me roar...OH. MY. GOODNESS. What a hectic two weeks it's been and it's only going to get crazier! I don't know where to even start with this...where else - with a song that's playing in my iPod. Brady Paisley actually wrote all his love songs about it he just doesn't know it...WHAT!? A girl can dream, can't she?

♫ I called to say I'm working late tonight
to cancel our dinner date
but she just said thats alright
and just like that she makes some other plans
saw a movie with a couple friends
had herself a ball
oh cause afterall

she's her own woman
without me, she does fine
she's her own woman - Brad Paisley ♫

I think the one thing I've learned through the last few years is that I need my independence. I see how many women there are out there that get out and have independence and I figure, why can't I have that? Granted, I have it all I want now, but I can't ever lose it. I've lost it once, never again. I also know I don't get out as much as I used to. So my goal - and possibly my new years resolution, get out once a month and go have girl time. Becoming a single mom has taken over my life.

So last night I had such a packed day with Bug. I can't tell you the last time I did something like that! We went and took pictures - he's sooooo cute.

It don't get much cuter than this.

The love of my life - he gets cuter as the days pass. He's going to be a heartbreaker...correction, he already is a heartbreaker with those eye lashes.

I finally finished my medical terminology class that was taking over any waking moment I had available. Yay for an A! That class kicked some serious ass. I made Dean's list for the summer, can't wait to get one for the fall. I know, I know, I missed graduating with honors with my first degree by .05 - NOT gonna happen this time around.

So yesterday after we went and saw big sis (aunty Melissa), dad (Big Bob), and brother Alec (cousin Alec). We unfortuantely took so much time getting pictures done that we missed the run, but caught the end of the award ceremony.

After that we hit up a little lunch with Aunty Dawn. Bug's been asking about her, so we decided to do lunch, errands, and hang out a bit because it's been such a long time. We've decided we need to hang out a little more often then once every 6 mos...

Well after Aunty Dawn time, we decided to spend time with Aunty Michelle, Baby Avery, and Uncle Scottie. Seeing as how Uncle Wade went out with Bubbie and Zayda, Michelle and I have been spending some time together since we all started talking again and decided to craft and have some girl time.Well for starters I decided to pick up some wine and dinner. Well that went GREAT. I bought some white wine to go with our pasta and then realized there was no wine opener. Yes, that is how it goes with Michelle and I. We went shopping one time and kept picking out the same things. So as we decided what to do about the wine we decided to save the hassle and just make a liquor store run. Okay - confession, the last time I made a liquor store run I was in college. Then to top it off, I bought Mike's Hard Lemonade...yeah I can't even tell you the last time I drank that before last night.

I attempted crafting - always goes well when step-by-step directions are involved. I learned how to ruffle and make a flower.

Don't laugh. It was my first attempt...



The final product was a burlap stocking - pretty awesome idea. Yay for Michelle and all her blogs and crafting ideas.

If I could get the phone to email me the picture I'd post it up. In the mean time, here's the link to Michelle's blog. Burlap Stocking

Side note: Yay for the holidays! Can't wait to buy the Christmas tree and decorate. They sell these in Old Town. I would love more than anything to own one.

♫ Christmas time is here

Happiness and cheer

Fun for all that children call

Their favorite time of the year

Snowflakes in the air

Carols everywhere

Olden times and ancient rhymes

Of love and dreams to share

Sleigh bells in the air

Beauty everywhere

Yuletide by the fireside

And joyful memories there

Christmas time is here

We'll be drawing near

Oh, that we could always see

Such spirit through the year

Oh, that we could always see

Such spirit through the year... ♫

This is the song that never ends...

....yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was, and they'll continue singing it forever just because...This is the song that never ends...

I swear there are days where I hear one song and I just can't stop singing it. I have to admit Reba McEntire and women are strong tend to be my favorite. Her songs, no matter how upset or pissed off I am can get me out of a mood in no time.

Today is my Bug day! Woohoo. I picked up Bug today and noticed he had a busted lip. His first one!!

I know it doesn't look too bad, but it's horrible. His little teeth and the little boys head did so much damage. It's discolored and it's pretty torn up on the inside of his lip. Oh well, boys will be boys and accidents happen. The joys of rasing a child of the opposite sex on your own always provides for entertainment. There are days I ask him where the manual is and he just looks at me like I'm crazy and I missed the memo that says I have to figure this out on my own. Well, thanks for the warning. He's luck he's cute and I love him more than anything in this world.

Alright, I have to get to bed because I have been staying up late hours and it's kicking me in the bottom. Plus because I have Bug my days start at least an hour earlier. Man I can't wait for the weekend to sleep in.

Until then I leave you with the song that I have been singing all day...

♫ It's everywhere you look
If you look hard enough
Its really not hard to see
Yeah, once you put your arms around it
You can never get too much
Love is a sweet, sweet thing

It's in the smile of a stranger
In the eyes of a child
On the corner of a crowded street
Its everywhere around us
Its always growing wild
Love is a sweet, sweet thing - Faith Hill ♫

To infinity and beyond....

♫ You've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me
If you've got troubles,I've got 'em too
There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you
We stick together and can see it through
Cause you've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me - Toy Story ♫

Yes, ladies and gentlemen - that's my kid with a runny nose. This is nothing new. As soon as you wipe his nose it runs right away. I have stock in Kleenex just because of how much the damn thing runs. I always ask him why it runs and he tells me - because it likes to. Okay, Mr. Smartypants.

I was so stoked for him to be his happy purple ghost and instead we ended up being Buzz Lightyear. Original. Real original. Maybe next year we can get a little more creative.

I have to have a bragging mom moment here - my Bug is SO polite, he minds his Ps and Qs. He told everyone Happy Halloween and Thank You that other parents were telling their children to take notes and to be more like Bug because of how respectful and polite he is! That's right I RAISED MY BOY RIGHT!

So after the third house of trick or treating Bug says to me - Mommy, my bag almost full. I cracked up! All I could do was think, boy you got a long way to go with that big bag Aunty Michelle gave us, but he was so excited I told him that the more houses we went to the more full it would be. Talk about running like a bat out of hell to the next house as he yells, TO INFINITY AND BEYOND.

Thank you Buzz, thank you.

I have to say, for being three and only going down a couple of blocks the kid made out like a bandit.



Unfortunately Bug had to go back to his dad's and tomorrow is Bug Love day. Only one way to send him back. Full of sugar. ♥

Today has been one of those days where I really REALLY wish I worked from home. For those of you who don't know what I do, I am a buyer for a defense contracting company. Pretty badass, huh? It gets more badass at the fact I really can't tell you a damn thing about my job or else....yeah, you know it. I'm gonna have to hire someone to come after you if you know anything more than that.

I have to admit I have no tolerance for stupid people. I have little tolerance for them to begin with but today was just one of those days where there just was none at all. In my previous blogs I've mentioned that I'm what Lace calls "Texas". You don't screw with me, you don't lie to me, and you don't ask me stupid questions without getting all your facts straight. Is that too hard to ask? APPARENTLY SO.

Today was just brutal. I had a vendor flat out lie and whine to me today and that just doesn't fly in my book. I don't care who you are. That sure as hell isn't going to make me want your business anymore. I've had a couple of those in the past year and I took care of that real quick. I don't use them anymore. I have a three year old and he doesn't whine and bitch as much as some of the people I deal with.